The C word

A new template.... A change. I normally dont like change, but the fact that I can control this change, whenever I feel like doing, so is appealing. I can do whatever I want to this blog, it is completely in my control.
Its a powerful word control. Has different meanings, for both good and evil. Example; God controlled the world, or Satan controlled sins. You can never use this word lightly..."Oh yeah my day was pretty good, since I control my parents and can do whatever I please".
Now loss of control, that's a whole other issue. That's why we want to have control in the first place. So we don't lose it. Once we lose it, we feel all is lost. If you can't control your kids you feel like everything is slowly getting worse and your losing everything you hold dear to you. As much as I want to say that you should just let go, come what may I'd be lying. If I said thats how I live my life, I have tried, I can say that but the fact is I can't. I need to have that control on everything possible so I don't feel incompitent and so I have some meaning.
Isn't that why both men and women want to be "in charge" of the relationship? Its not about sharing and doing it together like it should be. Its about one having control over the other. The woman wants security, and she knows its no gurantee so she wants to be able to say exactly where the relationship is going, where its at and where it will end. The man thinks its his job to keep the woman in line. If he didnt feel like he at least had the control of saying, "get me this" and having her do it, then he'd feel like he had nothing.
Its a tricky buisness. I think for the next week my goal will be to just let things go; have someone else tell me what I should do instead of thinking, I can do it myself thanks.